I'm going to....
Which is AWESOME but at the same time has me feeling a little bit like Kristen Bell meets sloth.
As soon as I heard about it last month, I made up my mind that I was going to go. No I don't know anyone else who's going and yes, that scares the everliving daylight out of me. (Why do I go all hillbilly when I'm freaked out? Must be the Arkansas-born part of me y'all) So when registration opened up Wednesday morning I was right there at 9:58, 9:59 and Bingo! I registered myself for Blogfest at 10:00am exactly. I was feeling pretty damned pleased with myself in that moment.
And then I looked up the itinerary and found out just who was going to be hosting the Kickoff.
Uh yeah. That would be Margaret Russell and Jonathan Adler. Then later there's a little cocktail party with, oh you may have heard of him, Thom Filicia. All in the first day!!
What have I done? I think I'm going to puke.
It's just too much, too much! I can't even deal.
To be honest, I'm a little bit terrified. Which makes no sense at all because I have no trouble talking to people I've never met and I'm not someone who is so in awe of celebrities that I become a babbling fool in their presence. In my furniture selling days I helped a certain Baywatch blonde (no, not Pamela Anderson) purchase a table and although I knew full well who she was, I acted all cool and normal. No way was I going to give her the satisfaction of thinking I was impressed by celebrity. Puh! We're just the same, you and me blondy. Except for the whole gorgeous, famous blonde part, exactly the same.
But these guys.....these guys are heavy weights in my profession. I aspire to have the kind of success they've achieved and I'm so intimidated.
Another confession: I'm more nervous about the other design bloggers who will be there. Isn't that nuts!? I follow a bunch of their blogs but don't know any of them personally. I have to admit that I'm feeling waaaay out of my league here. What if I act like such an unsophisticated goober that they all shun me and no one invites me to their link parties anymore?? What if they're all super nice and I'm just way too sarcastic that I look like a big jerk?
What if I make the "crazy face" that B says I must never ever make in public???
Back when I first decided I would go, I knew I would probably feel this way. I knew that most of the other bloggers had been blogging longer, had more clients/projects under their belts, had a stronger presence in the design/blogging community and that I would feel like a desert-dwelling fish out of water. And boy do I!
The fact that this whole event scares the crap out of me reinforces my need and desire to go. There is so much I want to accomplish in my career and my life and I need to be brave if any of it is going to happen.
So the way I see it, I can sit here for the next 3 months having daily panic attacks about how I measure up against all of the other bloggers and designers or I can anticipate meeting some pretty amazing people and hopefully making a few new friends. I'm still scared to death but I'm choosing to be brave...to try to be brave.
Oh dear lord, what am I going to wear???!!!